Some "Wicked" Thoughts
Friends.
I watched “Wicked” the other day with Dana and Jordan and I AM SPEECHLESS. Goodness. What a movie, what a story. Dana has seen the play on Broadway multiple times and I knew the general storyline, but wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
The way they captured the story, the depth and development of the characters - absolutely magical.
I don’t want to give any spoilers, but I felt so drawn to the the character of Elphaba (aka “The Wicked Witch of the West”). Far from being someone who is evil and bad and out to destroy Oz, she is actually good …
Someone who is demonized because she is different.
Someone who stands strong on her values.
Someone who isn’t afraid to walk away from a dream because the dream she finally acheived has proven to not align with who she is, and who she is becoming.
Someone who said “NO!” to “the System” only to have “the System” and the people of “the System” turn on her - outcasting her, demonizing her, judging her, shaming her, etc.
Phew.
There is so much to unpack and then the movie ended with the well known song “Defying Gravity” with these lyrics still ringing in my head …
“And if I’m flying solo at least I’m flying free / To those who ground me, take a message back from me … and nobody in all of Oz, no Wizard that there is or was is ever gonna bring me down.”
I feel this these days, honestly.
As my faith evolves again and I find myself shifting away from the Progressive world in the same way that I shifted away from the Conservative world … “the System” (and the people of “the System”), once again, isn’t happy.
This System?
You know it … don’t you?
It insists that you choose a side.
It insists that you demonize the “other side”.
It insists that you throw your support behind a candidate.
It insists that you take a stand for what you believe in.
It insists (often times - when religion is involved) that you lean on specific Bible verses or intepretations of those verses that appear to support your cause.
And please note:
“The System” (for me, anyways) isn’t “Democracy” (I think Democracy can be a really good thing).
And it’s not “Christianity” (I think Christianity can be a good thing).
And it’s not “Religion” (I think Religion can be a good thing!).
“The System” I’m speaking of, rather, is more of a way that we’ve become accustomed to living and being and moving through and operating in the world - a way we’ve been groomed or led to believe or to think is “normal”.
A way where it’s our way or the highway.
A way where we’re right and they’re wrong.
A way where we’re good and they’re evil.
A way where they are out to get us and we are out to save us.
A way where we demonize those we consider to be (or are told are!) “the other”.
And me?
I said “YES” to that System for a long, long time - it’s all I ever knew.
On “the Right”, I demonized “the Left” - I voted Republican straight down the line, Obama was the Anti-Christ, I preached hell and fire and brimstone, I insisted the earth is 6,000 years old, I memorized my Wayne Grudem Systematic Theology book. I argued with everyone who disagreed with me.
And then.
On the “the Left”, I demonized “the Right” - I voted Democrat, Trump was Hitler, I preached against hell and fire and brimstone, I insisted the earth is billions of years old, I memorized ideas from my Brian McLaren, Rob Bell, and Diana Butler Bass books (all friends of mine, by the way!). I argued with everyone who disagreed with me.
Yes - this System isn’t found on one side OR the other; rather, it’s found (again, I believe) on BOTH sides: encouraging the adherants of that side to mark the other side as the enemy and it’s side as the savior.
But now?
I mean.
I have my values, yes.
I have my beliefs, absolutely.
But.
I’m also tired of the fighting.
I’m tired of the arguing.
I’m tired of demonizing.
I’m tired of judging.
I’m tired of shaming.
I’m tired of pointing my finger.
… and over the last year I came to realize that the energy I felt and gave off on “the Right” is the same energy I felt and gave off on “the Left” - the same energy, thrown behind different values and candidates and ideals; and (again, for me, anyways) it just doesn’t seem to be working, it doesn’t seem to be making a single thing better.
These days, though, with my podcast and my writing and the various aspects of the “What If Project”, I feel a lot of pressure.
Lots of pressure.
Pressure to mock, to shame, to judge, to flip over tables (because “this is what Jesus did!”).
Everyone else is doing it, right?
So many podcasts.
So many blogs.
So many books.
People, authors, pastors, speakers, teachers, leaders - taking a stand, pointing their finger at the other side, shaming, demonizing, judging …
(Many with valid reasons, by the way.)
… and gaining quite the following by doing so.
“They are ruining everything!”
“Back us, we are trying to make the world better!”
It’s tempting to look at them and the “likes” they get and the “followers” and the “praise” and think, “wow - I should be doing that too.”
And then a few weeks back I got an email from a friend and previous podcast guest who said I’m a “special kind of vile”for not “shaming” everyone who voted for Donald Trump and that he was removing all support for me and my work.
I’m vile?
For not shaming?
My neighbors?
My community members?
This person was truly ANGRY that I wasn’t doing what those other authors, podcasters, etc. are doing.
Sigh.
But, this is what happens when you say “NO.” to the System, isn’t it? The System turns on you and demonizes you as a troublemaker, wishy-washy, weak, etc. This is what the System did to Elphaba in “Wicked” when she finally appeared before the Great Oz (her dream!) only be asked to do something that went against her values, something that deep in her bones she knew wasn’t right; and when she said “NO.”, she was demonized, she was called “Wicked”, she was labeled as “The Wicked Witch of the West”.
And so I’ve said “NO.” to the System I mentioned above.
I’ve decided not to mock and shame, not to demonize and call names. I’ve chosen not to cancel and write off, not to shut out and shut down. I’ve chosen to explore a different way to be and move and exist in the world, even if I don’t fully know what that way is.
The System or the Wizard says to “do this” and I’ve said, “NO.” - it feels like it’s going against the values that are growing in me, something that deep in my bones no longer feels right.
And so in that way I sort of feel like Elphaba in “Wicked”.
I reached the top of the tower, the top of the System where I’ve stood among the Wizards of both the Conservative and Progressive worlds …
The gatekeepers.
The loudest of the voices.
The ones creating the rules.
The ones using making real changes for their sides.
The ones who seem to have all the answers.
The ones who seem to be “in the know”.
… I’ve gotten to know them, I (at times) became one of them as I was given a spot at the table - to use my voice and my work to build up “our side” and promote “our values” and defeat “the other side”. I stood in pulpits, wrote on blogs, spoke on podcasts, wrote term papers and used every ounce of energy to back one side (at one time the RIGHT side and at another time the LEFT side) while speaking against the other.
But.
Now?
I’ve said “NO.” to those Wizards, I’ve said “NO.” to the way of the System, I’ve declared that I want to live a different way, I want to explore a different way of being because this place, this thing, this way of being that I find myself in as I shout at the other side … it no longer aligns with the kind of person I feel called to be, the kind of person I am becoming - something that not many people (so far) really seem to understand, a way that many have told me they cannot and will not support.
But, as Elphaba sang to us …
And if I’m flying solo at least I’m flying free.
To those who want to ground me (in the ways of the System), take a message back from me.
Nobody in all of Oz, in all of the System, no Wizard that there is or was is ever gonna bring me down.
Yes.
Maybe you feel that too? Let’s not be afraid of disappointing the Wizards, friends. Let’s not be afraid of walking away from the place we dreamed of getting to when we realize that place doesn’t actually align very well with our values. Let’s dare to defy gravity, dare to believe we can fly into a new way of being.
And here this.
There are times when (I think) we need to come together and take a stand against evil. There’s a situation in Texas now, for instance, where Republicans and Democrats are coming together to take a stand against some Far Right billionaires who are trying to use their money and power and influence to create policies that will uphold their values and really hurt other people.
Those situations, though?
I’ve come to realize (and you don’t need to agree with this, obviously) that everyone who disagrees with us isn’t a monster, everyone who sees things differently isn’t a dictator or a racist or a woke-pie-in-the-sky person who is out of touch with reality.
Some Wizards / adherants of the the System are out to do some pretty evil things for whatever reason they may have while other Wizards merely see things differently (sometimes very differently) than we do.
And.
Honestly?
I think we need to let those Wizards do Wizardly things. I have no issues with my friends who stand staunchly on the Left or the Right, advocating for their sides and their values. I might disagree with some of them (some more strongly than others), but they are people who are using their voice to share what they think, what they believe. And whether I agree with them or not, we need those people in the world - we need people using their voices.
BUT.
We also need people who are looking for a different way, a way that reminds us that beneath all the things that the System wants us to be - beneath our beliefs and values and opinions and judgements … beneath it all, we all are connected to one another via the Divine spark that we all share.
Yes (I believe) …
We are all connected to the Divine.
We are all connected to one another.
… And so, me?
I’m tapping into my inner Elphaba, I’m taking hold of my broom, and I’m flying off to discover this new thing.
Much love,
Glenn || PATREON / ART STUDIO