Shedding People, Places, and Ideas

A while back I told you about how Luke is the only Gospel that records the story of 12-year old Jesus being accidentally left behind by his parents when they departed Jerusalem after the Passover Feast and headed for home.  We talked about how when they finally found him he was ...

In the TEMPLE.

Talking to the TEACHERS, asking them questions and sharing his own ideas.

We also talked about how this story was most likely made up as children who were Jesus' age and not yet bar mitzvahed would not have been welcome in the temple, especially to engage with the teachers.  

And so it's likely that Luke made up this story not to be deceptive, but to put an exclamation point on an idea he was trying to get across to his readers.

What idea?

Luke was writing around 85CE right around the time the newly appointed leaders of Judaism were trying to rebuild their religion in the wake up of the Temple's destruction in 70CE and one of the first things these new leaders did was declare that any sect of Judaism that believed the Messiah had already come should be tossed off of the ship and left to fend for themselves in the world.

In other words, anyone who believed that the Messiah had already come was no longer considered a Jew.

The Jewish Christians (Jews who believed Jesus was the Messiah who had come for all people, not just the Jews) were the first to be shown the door and so Luke was writing to them, to those outcasts, and perhaps used this story to remind them that ...

Just as Jesus went to the Temple.

AND.

Just as Jesus spoke with the leaders of the Temple.

... so they too can mentally go back to those places because as much pain as their Mother Faith had caused them, it was still their faith, it was still the place that they came from; and so although much of it needed to be SHED so that they could move on and establish themselves and their own faith in the world ... they could still remember, appreciate, and hold space in their hearts for the place where they came from, the place where their roots were established.

This morning, though, I'm thinking about this story again and the idea of "SHEDDING" because even though Luke shows Jesus going to the temple and spending time with the teachers so as to remind his readers to hold space for those people and places that at one time deeply impacted their faith ... he also shows Jesus eventually leaving that place, leaving Jerusalem, and going back home with his mom and dad to live his life.

Right?

And so just as Luke wants his readers to hold space and honor for the people and places from which they came, he (perhaps?) also wants to tell his readers that it's OK and necessary to SHED some of those people and places, to leave them behind, and to move on with their lives.

BUT.

This is hard work ... right?

Isn't it?

Because on one hand we may have all sorts of feelings for the people and places from which we came and we might not want to offend them, make them sad, cause them to be angry, or be the source of their grief, upset, disappointment, etc.

I felt this a lot with my friends and professors at school.

I went to a Bible College and Seminary that were part of the same institution and so some of the professors who taught me AND some of the students I attended both of those schools with ... some of them I've known for more than 20 years.  

And so.

For me.

Although I felt the Spirit's whisper that it was time to move on from those people, those places, those ideas ... to shed them ... and to move on with my life, to settle into a new tribe with new friends and teachers and fellow students and ideas ... I didn't want to hurt people, I didn't want to leave the comfortable places, and I didn't want to let go of the ideas that I was once so certain about.

My point is that it was a struggle and the question I really had to answer was ...

Am I going to stay here and stay with these people and ideas and not really be true to myself?

OR.

Am I going to hold gratefulness in my heart for the experiences and relationships I had and move on into a land of uncertainty, not really knowing the people, places, and ideas that await me ... but waking up every morning knowing I'm being true to myself?

On the other hand, though ... sometimes the pain we experienced from the place where we once put down our roots and the people in those places, sometimes the pain that came from years of abuse, trauma, etc. can make us so ready to move on that we just want to burn it all down and get out as quickly as possible.  

And.

Although that's more than understandable, the potential problem is that if we move into a new thing without processing the pain from the old thing we can bring that pain and the ways in which we react to situations that remind us of it with us and end up causing ourselves and those around us lots and lots of pain.

So, to summarize - it's complicated and hard work, right?

Churches.

Friends.

Tribes.

Family.

Teachers.

Theologies.

Ideas.

Beliefs.

... We may sense that we've moved beyond these people, places, and ideas and that it's time to pack up and leave the Temple, the Teachers, and Jerusalem behind; and, sadly, we may even realize that in some ways we've been traumatized by these people and things and places in the past and so all of that leaves us with 3 choices, really.

ONE - stay so we don't upset the apple cart and just toe the line to keep everyone happy, keep our family in tact, our job, etc, etc, etc.

TWO - blow it all up and leave.

THREE - process the many angles of it and decide what (if anything) needs to stay with us as we move into the new season of life AND what ideas, places, and people are no longer healthy for us and need to be shed and left behind.

No one can tell you how to move on from your past.  Sometimes you may need to stick around the people and places for a bit and sometimes you may very well need to blow it all up and move on for your own wellbeing or the wellbeing of your loved ones. And still, other times, you may be able to exit and find the space and time to process the pain and all the different feelings you're carrying.  Sometimes it may even be a mix of all 3!

There is no right way, no cookie-cutter mold for how any of this works.

One constant, though, is that we all must shed some things - people, places, ideas, etc. if we want to move forward.  In his book "Radical Transformation" Alexander John Shaia says that ...

"A mature life must make difficult decisions about change regardless of society's expectations."

Ooo, I feel that.  Do you?

When you begin to "deconstruct" and ask questions about your faith and upbringing and when you begin to sense that it may be time to move on ... the tribe from which you came will have all sorts of different expectations - some will expect you to stay, some will expect you to toe the line, some will expect you to shut your mouth and stuff down your questions, some will expect you to wrestle with the questions but come to the conclusions that have been laid out for you, some will expect you to feel ashamed of yourself and never come back, some will expect you to pray more or read your Bible more or go to church more or ...

Everyone will have an opinion.

A mature life, though, as Alexander said, must make some difficult decisions regarding what needs to be shed and how it needs to be shed.

I can't tell you how to do that, but what I can say is that as you wade through those waters and listen for the Spirit's guidance ... I am here with you, cheering you on, reminding you that you aren't alone.

Much love,  

• Glenn || PATREON / BUY ME A COFFEE