Waves
One of my favorite things to do is sit on the beach and stare at the ocean. I love the waves and the mist that they shoot into air when they crash against the rocks. I love to watch the birds hover over the water and the occasional fish that will jump up almost seeming to test the birds above, daring them to swoop down and grab it.
But here's the interesting (and somewhat obvious) thing about waves: waves are water, right?
Sure.
There might be BIG waves and small waves.
There might be CRASHING waves and rolling waves.
There might be LOUD waves and quiet waves.
There might be HIGH waves and low waves.
BUT.
At the end of the day, though, the wave is just water - water that was met with the perfect conditions of ...
Some wind.
And earth rotation.
And gravitational pull from the moon.
... so that it (the wave) could manifest and rise up from the water to jump and lunge and dance across the ocean surface before crashing onto the beach or some rocks and returning back to the ocean from which it came.
And so even though the water ceases to exist in it's wave-like-form, the water itself remains. Right? The wave is just water and so even though our naked eye no longer sees the wave, the wave is still there - it's just swallowed up by the larger body of water (the ocean) from which it came where it now rests with all of the other waves that came before it.
Thich Nhat Hanh says that "in her ignorance a wave (may be) subject to the fear of birth, death, high, low, etc." because it's ignorant of its true self.
If you can imagine a wave as a living being that has no idea it is part of the larger ocean (that it's merely a manifestation of the water surrounding it), that wave might wonder ...
When it was born?
When it will die?
How it will die?
What it will feel like when it dies?
Why some waves are bigger?
Why some are smaller?
Why she's not as loud or strong as a neighboring wave?
What its purpose is?
... That wave might be filled with wonder about how it came to be and worry or fear or anxiety about when it will cease to be.
BUT.
You and I, zooming out - we can look at the wave and tell her not to worry about where it came from or where it will go when it ceases to be because the wave is not a wave, it's merely a manifestation of the water around it, the expansive ocean from which it came; and although it will one day be invisible to the naked human eye, there will never be a time when it doesn't exist - it will always exist within the embrace of the ocean and all of the waves that existed and crashed upon the rocks before it.
For a long time, I (like the wave) was ignorant of my true self. I assumed I was born or came to be on January 25, 1982 and that I'll die on some other date and go to heaven or something where I'll do ... something (who knows!) ... for all of eternity.
These days, though. I don't know.
Jesus once referred to himself as the "Great I Am". In other words, there was never a time when he didn't exist and there will never be a time when he doesn't exist ... he just is.
I imagine him saying, "There was never a time when I wasn't and there was never a time when I won't be ... I just ... I Am."
I used to think that those words (I Am) only referred to Jesus. "Jesus is God", I thought, "and God is eternal - He is the 'Great I Am' ... it's a title reserved only for Him, one that is forever worthy of my worship and devotion."
Today, though.
Today I see Jesus not as some Divine Being who came to show me all that I'm not, but a very humanly divine fellow who came to show me and remind me of all that ... I Am.
Yes.
All that I AM.
He came (I think) to hold up a mirror to the human race and loudly declare, "wake up! Remember! THIS is who you are. THIS is how you are to live. THIS is what you can do. THIS is who you can be."
And so when Jesus calls himself "I Am" (in John 8) I don't think he's using the phrase to tell us how different he is from us, but to remind us of how similar we are to him and how (just like him) there was never a time when we didn't exist and there will never be a time when we don't exist.
I'm not Glenn who was born on January 25, 1982.
I'm not Glenn who will die on ________.
I'm just ... Glenn.
I've spent a large portion of my life like a wave who is ignorant of the water from which she came, assuming that I came into being one day 40 years ago and that once I crash upon a rock (in 30, 40, 50 years from now) I'll cease to be and that somehow God saw fit for me to spend time on earth during this short window of time.
Now, though, I'm beginning to realize that this short window of time is merely a time when I manifested out of the water or the ocean of the Divine from which I came to walk the earth as Glenn Siepert and that one day in 30, 40, or 50 years I'll un-manifest from this body to take my place back in the ocean of the Divine from which I came where I'll be surrounded by and embraced by the other waves or ancestors who came before me ...
My grandma.
My great-grandma.
My grandpa.
My great-grandpa.
Etc.
In other words, although I will no longer be here walking around and causing trouble as "Glenn Siepert" ... I will still be around, invisible to the naked eye, but roaming around the cosmos, the ocean of the Divine, doing whatever and being whatever I'll be doing and being the next time I manifest as a wave ... always existing nonetheless along with the other waves who came before me.
Perhaps birth and death, then, are just illusions.
Maybe?
Perhaps the breath of God or The Christ or the Logos is the ocean of the Divine from which we all (along with all of creation) come and perhaps in this very moment we are all individual waves who will each (in our own time) eventually crash into a rock, explode into a mist of beauty, and return back to the ocean from which we came - never ceasing to be, always being.
What does all of this mean?
I don't know.
But perhaps it can make us less afraid of death or less certain life and death and more full of wonder and hope of what this crazy thing we call life is all about.
Much love.
Glenn || MY BOOK || PATREON || BUY ME A COFFEE